I Kissed Dating Goodbye: A New Attitude Toward Relationships and Romance

Joshua Harris

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I Kissed Dating Goodbye: A New Attitude Toward Relationships and Romance

I Kissed Dating Goodbye A New Attitude Toward Relationships and Romance While most Christians agree to seek purity and save sex for marriage few have been given a blueprint for how that should affect their view of dating and love In I Kissed Dating Goodbye Joshua Harris

  • Title: I Kissed Dating Goodbye: A New Attitude Toward Relationships and Romance
  • Author: Joshua Harris
  • ISBN: 9781590521359
  • Page: 410
  • Format: Paperback
  • While most Christians agree to seek purity and save sex for marriage, few have been given a blueprint for how that should affect their view of dating and love In I Kissed Dating Goodbye, Joshua Harris exposes the Seven Habits of Highly Defective Dating and offers a realistic outline of how to have a biblical vision of marriage Harris contends that one must begin with aWhile most Christians agree to seek purity and save sex for marriage, few have been given a blueprint for how that should affect their view of dating and love In I Kissed Dating Goodbye, Joshua Harris exposes the Seven Habits of Highly Defective Dating and offers a realistic outline of how to have a biblical vision of marriage Harris contends that one must begin with a new attitude, viewing love, purity, and singleness from God s perspective rather than thinking that love and romance are to be enjoyed solely for recreation In such well named chapters as Guarding Your Heart and What Matters at Fifty, Harris encourages the reader to look at one s character rather than reveling in infatuation, to regard love as a truly selfless, biblical act rather than a feeling He refutes the concept that we are victims of falling in love that it is beyond our control , saying that God wants us to seek guidance from scriptural truth, not feeling Smart love looks beyond personal desires and the gratification of the moment It looks at the big picture serving others and glorifying God Before you roll your eyes, moaning that this sounds terribly unromantic, know that Harris does a superb job of couching his convictions in the sincere belief that if we are purposeful in our singleness and date with integrity, a fulfilled marriage awaits us in God s timing Jill Heatherly

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      Published :2018-06-12T21:09:59+00:00

    One thought on “I Kissed Dating Goodbye: A New Attitude Toward Relationships and Romance

    1. Adam on said:

      It's weird.When I read this for the first and only time, I had just parted ways with a high school girlfriend. Our relationship had been the most intense I'd ever had, and while we were in it, we were both pretty positive that this was real and fervent love. She's now happily married to a great guy who isn't me, and I'm now happily married to an amazing woman who isn't her. I'm not proud of how it ended, but it needed to.This book fell into the midst of that dynamic in my life, and it rocked me. [...]

    2. Gray Cox on said:

      I don't even agree with dating before you're old enough to marry and I disliked this book. I'm not even boy crazy, and I disliked this book. True, it had some good points, but it mistook attraction for lust, it mistook imperfections for deal breakers. I feel like this book is a bit dangerous for homeschool girls like me to read, it's 2018 now, and yet girls my age still expect guys to seek them out like snow white, and sweep them off their feet.Wake up. Please don't just expect the right guy to [...]

    3. Allison on said:

      I am a 17 year old christian teenage girl who has lived her relationship life according to this book and has no regrets. I have healthy friendships with a lot of guys but--amazingly enough--not a single boyfriend. And my life has been just fine for it. Actually, my life has been great. The whole point of the book is that there is a season for everything: a season for investing in friendships, and a season for dating/courting for the purpose of marriage. This has worked just fine for all the peop [...]

    4. Rock Rockwell on said:

      I actually kissed dating goodbye after I got married (except the infrequent times my wife and I can leave our kids at home and go out for a quick dinner). However, this book really is a challenge to teens and younger adults (college/young singles) to rethink their mindset of the 'dating' culture. Some will cringe in reading this ideology for the first time, but when contimplating how to protect your own holiness and the purity of others, it makes more sense. Accountability and NOT acting on feel [...]

    5. Paul, on said:

      “Tired of the game? Kiss dating goodbye. Dating: Isn't there a better way? I Kissed Dating Goodbye suggests there is. Reorder your romantic life in the light of God's Word and find more fulfillment than a date could ever give – a life of sincere love, true purity, and purposeful singleness.” That is the promise and the premise behind Joshua Harris' new book I Kissed Dating Goodbye. Joshua Harris writes pretty well, and he makes several good points in this book. When he talks about God's vi [...]

    6. Harman on said:

      While the book is well-written and the ideas are well-expressed and thought out, Harris' theories just don't play well in a complex world filled with people. There is no set of rules or philosophies that one can apply to Christian premarital romance (nor any kind of romance, nor any kind of relationship, for that matter), and I believe that, unfortunately, Harris' ideas are a contribution to a philosophy that has caused much pain and cynicism in young single Christian circles (I can say this fro [...]

    7. Donita Luz on said:

      "A relationship based solely on physical attraction and romantic feelings will last only as long as the feelings last.By inflating the importance of feelings, we neglect the impt of putting love in action. When we evaluate the quality of our love for someone else simply by our own emotional fulfillment, we are being selfish.Feelings governed them, and finally, when the feelings ended, so did their relationship." I admit I didn't agree with everything that's written on this book. It was a bit jud [...]

    8. Kacey on said:

      Coming from a happily married woman, I found this to be a stupid composition that follows a typical Christian formula of twisting Scripture to suit the point the author wants to make. "Purposeful singleness"? Common sense, rather than blowing up your every state of being into assuring yourself of your godliness, will get you further in my opinion. Only made a splash because it was written by a young, attractive male who claimed to have quit dating for good. Don't listen to me, though, read it fo [...]

    9. Christopher on said:

      I was forced to read this book by the female youth leader in a youth group I was a part of, along with all the other guys. Some of us kissed dating goodbye, others of us kissed youth group goodbye.

    10. emilie.❤ on said:

      I know no one's going to read my review, but I've just been itching to write it. I have a feeling it will turn into a long rambling session since I feel pretty strongly about this subject. I know I'm just another young adult who wasn't fond of this book, so my critique is probably insignificant among the sea of others out there. I know that I'm just "young and foolish" and how could I ever question this book's teachings-everyone should do it! Everyone who has ever followed what Joshua Harris say [...]

    11. Mark on said:

      I read this book when I was a broken-hearted nineteen-year-old. At the time the idea of kissing dating goodbye and doing it in the name of God seemed like a grand idea. I think it was largely because I had no dates to kiss goodbye, so it gave me some noble reason to beyond the fact that girls didn't like me and the fact that despite my liking them I was terrified of them. I think Harris has some very valid points as best as I can remember, but they are a bit extreme and maybe even unrealistic. A [...]

    12. Rat de bibliothèque on said:

      In this book Joshua Harris tells you to, as the title suggests, to kiss dating goodbye, suggesting that here is a better way to approach romance than simple "dating" could ever provide.He urges you to ask yourself "what is your motivation in relationships, pleasing yourself or serving others?", "do you give yourself away physically or emotionally in ways you will regret when married?", and "does your current relationship hinder you from serving God as a single person?".This book does not say tha [...]

    13. Altovise on said:

      I first heard of Josh Harris on a Christian radio station. I was driving and listening to him talk about the pitfalls of modern dating. I was so captivated by his message, that I sat in the car listening long after I arrived at my destination. I went and purchased this book the next day.After the first chapter, I put it down. It was a lot to take in for an ex-feminist, control freak like me. I talked to my dad about it and decided to give the book a chance. My love life has never been the same.I [...]

    14. Robyn on said:

      I thought the book title was preaching to the choir at & before the time I read it--I didn't care for the dating scene & still don't, but I like having some purpose to being single, rather than just accepting it as an accidental fate.Josh Harris does a good job writing the book, & I feel bad that I didn't love it like so many people who reviewed it did.It seemed odd that the premise of the book is "dating is stupid; but don't quit dating just b/c it's stupid, quit b/c there's somethi [...]

    15. Shantelle on said:

      Good read! Has some good advice, for sure. I enjoyed it a second time around.Quotes from the BookBy inflating the importance of feelings, we neglect the importance of putting love into action.Christ taught that love is not for the fulfillment of self but for the good of others and the glory of God. True love is selfless. It gives; it sacrifices; it dies to its own needs.Christ also showed that true love is not measured or governed by feeling.But He laid His feelings before the Father, giving Him [...]

    16. Katie on said:

      The title of this book is different, which is why I picked it up in the first place. The book isn't so much about giving up dating as the title implies, it's more about not dating seriously until you are ready to get married, and to use the time gaining a strong relationships with good friends and especially with Heavenly Father. The author, Joshua Harris, really drives home the idea that singleness is not something to dread, but to realize it as a gift.

    17. Megan on said:

      I really didn't appreciate this book. I felt it did more to exacerbate the complicated terrain of navigating adolescence as a Christian than it helped. I could also go into the theological problems a book like this presents to evangelical America, but I won't bother.

    18. Terri Lynn on said:

      Recently a Christian friend, knowing that we are Atheists, gave me some very weird books for my 19 year old daughter who is a single, Atheist student and was angry about the books. I read through them because their weirdness was so fascinating. I was aware of this book because we homeschool just as the Harris family did (Josh is a homeschool grad). Yes, this is very weird. I have no problems with young people going out in groups but if someone thinks this will keep them from having sex, I have s [...]

    19. Tiffany on said:

      I'm a firm believer that there is no cookie-cutter way of dating. Everyone's story is different, yet, this book came off as if it is the ONLY way to do things. I'm not saying that the book is completely wrong, it brings up a few good points, but ultimatelyI don't know that any book can tell you how to date or how to live.

    20. Sara on said:

      This book was on the unpopular list, probably because people couldn't imagine life with restrictions on dating or whatever. I haven't read it in a while because my mom bought it and where she put it I don't know, but I love it, so there. I think everyone should read it and I think that the author was very brave to address such an issue.

    21. Kierstyn Elisabeth on said:

      When I first read “I Kissed Dating Goodbye”, I wanted to like it. I desperately tried to enjoy it, understand it in entirety, and implement all of its concepts into my life. I could not do so. I have been raised Christian and have accepted the faith as my own these past few years. I am completely in love with Jesus Christ and I believe the Bible with all of my heart. My friend, who loaned me the book, adored it and uses it as the manual for her romantic life. My mother could not have been mo [...]

    22. DeeAnn on said:

      Interesting idea and understandable concepts if you are in high school and college. I really think that people could benefit from the idea. However, for those who are college aged and higher, it's method of finding a spouse I find to be an exercise in immaturity and for those who are not in a high-volume, high opportunity situation (like college is), you may find yourself incredibly lonely practicing these concepts. I call it an exercise in immaturity because by avoiding dating altogether, you a [...]

    23. Holly on said:

      I wanted to throw this book out of my car while driving at a neurotic speed. I rolled my eyes through the whole thing, and even now as im writing this reviewSeriously joshua harris?? I mean SERIOUSLY??I read this whole book. Oh yes i did. And i could have said in two sentences what it took him 200 and something pages to write! 1. Women lock yourselves in the house, because you cant discern who to and not to date.2. Put on a diaper and ask your daddy to start spoon feeding you again cause you can [...]

    24. Chris on said:

      I now view every woman as another mans future wife. I will treat every woman with respect. I am growing in my faith and becoming the future husband and father i was meant to be.

    25. Jules on said:

      The Bible does not say, "THOU SHALT NOT DATE" but it does call us to holiness and to protect the purity of others. I got hooked by this book. As I read this, i felt i was vindicated. That by God's grace I am not the only person in this world who advocate something like this. Joshua shared his convictions with regards to dating – if he is not ready for intimacy, for marriage, he will not commit to be in a relationship with someone (even giving hints when there are times that he already got a pr [...]

    26. Laura on said:

      This book continues to be a great inspiration to me, and this is my second time reading it, the first being when I was newly christened a teenager. Joshua Harris has such a straightforward way of showing you why he believes Dating can lead people astray and how you can live above that lifestyle. Each chapter had me convinced that Joshua Harris was onto something golden, something that I wanted to be a part of, this whole non-dating revolution. And all this was years ago, when I first read and be [...]

    27. Brittany on said:

      I've been having a really hard time interpretting what the Word states about relationships, sex before marraige, and dating. I, as a christian, feel its necessary not only to abide by the law of God, but to understand to gift of pleasure and love and why it is a godly experience if patience allows me to wait until marraige. Joshua Harris is a great author, very straight-forward and easy to understand. I highly recommend all of his books!

    28. Abigail on said:

      I want to kiss this book goodbye. There are some great principles presented, but it comes across as too dogmatic on issues that aren't always cut and dry-to the point of seeming legalistic. The writing itself is poor, which distracts from the content. Maybe I'm too picky, but I think you can get the same great points in other well-written, grace-driven sources. Read it with a grain of salt.

    29. Victoria Arechiga on said:

      I LOVED THIS BOOK! I had started reading this book when I entered into a relationship with my first boyfriend. (My dearest friend Matusalen Barcenas, had give me a copy of this book a few years back for Christmas, and I didnt find a need to read it until that moment)I read a few of its chapters then I put it away. After a 5 months of dating, we had to break up because some of our parents didnt agree that we should be dating if we weren't considering a long term goal that would be marriage. Even [...]

    30. Darin on said:

      This book was amazing! For Christians who are truly serious about their relationship with God, this book provides inspiration and motivation to stop looking for love that fails, words that are sweet and void of meaning or truth. It speaks from the heart of a man who knows what he is talking about and although many will and have criticized this book, i believe if you read it with an open heart you will have to admit that his argument makes sense.Truly, I am so into this book and his philisophy an [...]

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